Since I have gotten my EECS/Physics simultaneous degree approved, I feel a need to justify this latest act of lunacy on my part. Of course, "justify" isn't exactly the right word. More like, "examine the impulsive reasons behind [action]" In short, I'm doing this ghastly abomination of a double major because I FEEL like it.First off, I would like to state that I'm a nerd. Many of you are inclined to believe that this is like saying ice melts into water (it's my username for crying out loud). But formalities need to be taken care of. So before we dive into the meat of the discussion, we should formally define this term "nerd" and work from there:
Nerd (pronounced /ˈnɜrd/) is a term often bearing a derogatory connotation or stereotype, that refers to a person who passionately pursues intellectual activities, esoteric knowledge, or other obscure interests rather than engaging in more social or popular activities. Therefore, a nerd is often excluded from physical activity and considered a loner by peers or will tend to associate with like-minded people.
(I, and many others who consider themselves as I do, do not consider the term derogatory. Perhaps it is only derogatory to people who do not consider themselves as nerds. But I digress, and resume the regularly scheduled discussion)
On the first point: I really really really really really like what I do. For all my griping and complaining the past two years, I really enjoyed the things I did. All the all nighters I pulled for my technical classes weren't really terrible: often I did just because I couldn't stop doing it. Call me crazy. Even last semester, when I worked on CS150 20 hours a day for 2 weeks, I was somewhat glad I had an excuse to devote my time to something like that. It is all worth it just to see your designs hum to life, or watch as the equations coalesce into some beautiful statement about the natural world. And yes, that statement was a little bit corny. But I get corny when I really really really really really like things.
What about the rest of the things life has to offer you say? Well, suffice it to say, if I don't know what I'm missing out on, I'm not really all that sad. Now, this is not to say that I abhor socialization and despise people. On the contrary, I love both. But I, like most other people, don't like going out of my way to socialize and make friends. That means since "in my way" involves little social interaction, that leaves me with minimum social connections. This is not entirely distressing to me: I like having only a few good friends to keep up good relations with. Maybe I'll talk about my social philosophies in a later post.
Does all this mean I've found my purpose in life? That I love it so much, I'm willing to exclude myself from a bunch of other things in the meantime? Maybe. At least for the next two years. However, "purpose in life" isn't exactly the term I would use to describe this latest feeling. I just like it. You see, when it comes right down to it, I am an impulsive person. I do what I feel like doing when I feel like doing it. This is because it is a rare occasion to feel like doing something, particularly if it's productive, and whether or not it is a smart decision is left as a secondary concern. So here's to two more years of weekly all nighters and 20 hour days.
No Regrets
