The first thing anybody needs to know about me is...well hold up a minute there. The first thing anybody needs to know about me is that I'm single and the second that I'm incredibly warm and cuddly and may occasionally do nice things for you, particularly if you're a girl.
But the THIRD thing after that is that
I
LOVE
HATS!
Seriously. Hats embody everything that I am: sometimes practical and reserved, sometimes kooky and zany, and rarely ever more than marginally useful. Now don't get me wrong here. I'm not one of those guys who goes out and buys enough baseball caps to cover the entire world, and maybe Mars' polar ice caps (I actually don't like baseball caps at all). Nono, I look for the interesting hats.
My hat selection generally follows three criteria: does it shield my eyes from the sun wherever I turn? Does it keep my head warm down to my ears? Will it ever go well with a future unspecified and likely last-minute conceived Halloween costume? Ahhh yes, you say, now things make a little more sense.
Now before you judge me, I will have you know that I'm not one of those fashionable people who like to accessori-szh (<-- lame attempt at a valley girl accent). In fact, hats may be responsible for 80-90% of any poor fashion choices I make (100% of which I am blissfully unaware of). But I don't care. I like hats because of how useful they are to me.
Oh, and did I mention I was single and incredibly warm and cuddly and may occasionally do nice things to you, particularly if you're a girl?
